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From Rober Downey Jr To Tom Cruise – 70+ Best Tropic Thunder Quotes

Here’s a selection of Tropic Thunder Quotes, covering topics such as Les Grossman, Jack Black, inpiration, love and life.

We really hope you enjoy these quotes and that they give you something to think about.

As for why I’m in this movie, maybe I just knew I had to represent. Cause they one good part in this movie for a black man and they gave it to Crocodile Dundee.Kirk
Lazarus: Pump your brakes, kid. That man’s a national treasure.
Chino: I just wanted to throw another shrimp on your Barbie.
Lazarus: That sh*t ain’t funny.
Chino: I’m just f*cking with you, Kangaroo Jack. I’m sorry if a dingo ate yo baby.
Lazarus: You know that’s a true story? Lady lost her kid. You about to cross a f*cking line.
Kevin Sandusky: Hey guys could we just cool it…
Chino: You know what, f*ck that, I’m sick of this koala-hunting nigga- [Kirk slaps Alpa. Alpa tries to punch Kirk but Kirk grabs his fist and pulls him in and embraces him.]
Lazarus: For 400 years, that word has kept our people down.
Chino: [confused]…what the f*ck!?
Lazarus: Took a whole lot of tryin, just to get up that hill, but now we up in the big leagues…
Chino: [Breaks away from Kirk] That’s the theme songs from The Jeffersons.
Lazarus: Just cause it’s a theme song doesn’t mean it’s not true.

We’ve been handed an incredible opportunity here, Peck.
Studio Executive Rob Slolom

Les Grossman [ to Four Leaf ] : You’re a Great American, This Nation Owes you a huge debt….[ angrily ] Now Shut The f*ck Up and let me do my job!!!!!!
Les Grossman

You grew hands!
Jeff Portnoy

I don’t read the script. The script reads me.
Kirk Lazarus

That’s for Brooklyn, motherf*cker!
Alpa Chino

That’s what that playin’ God stuff was about, tryin to get us to act good to save the movie.
Tugg Speedman

Hey, Alpa. If you get me some drugs I will totally suck your c*ck. Stroke the shaft, cradle the balls, swallow the gravy! C’mon man, let’s do this!
Jeff Portnoy

You can’t be serious?
Rick Peck

I don’t drop character ’til I’ve done the DVD commentary
Kirk Lazarus

This walkie talkie goes to the helicopter, and the helicopter is God. And I am Jesus Christ. And you are my chosen disciples.
Damien Cockburn

[incensed at Flaming Dragon’s demands] Okay Flaming Dragon, f***face. First, take a big step back… and literally f*** your own face! I don’t know what kind of pan-Pacific bullsh*t power play you’re trying to pull here, but Asia, Jack, is my territory. So whatever you’re thinking, you’d better think again! Otherwise I’m gonna have to head down there and I will rain down an ungodly f***ing firestorm upon you! You’re gonna have to call the f***ing United Nations and get a f***ing binding resolution to keep me from f***ing destroying you. I am talking scorched-earth, motherf***er! I will massacre you! I will f*** you up! [hangs up; to assistant] Can you find out who that was?
Les Grossman

Tugg Speedman: I can’t feel my legs….
Kirk Lazarus: They ain’t nothin’, but a thang

But they’re trained soldiers.
Alpa Chino

Never go full retard.
Kirk Lazarus

I’m a lead farmer mother f*cker!
Kirk Lazarus

Welcome to the goodie room!
Studio Executive Rob Slolom

Tugg Speedman: This is insane. Are you really going to abandon this movie? We’re supposed to be a unit!
Kirk Lazarus: Suck my unit.

Suck my unit!!
Kirk Lazarus

A hooker. Oh Jesus, you killed a hooker!
Rick Peck

This is Less Grossman, who is this?
Les Grossman

Alpa and I is already wearin’ Earth mama’s natural night camo.
Kirk Lazarus

Shut the f*ck up & let me do my job!
Les Grossman

[The Tropic Thunder production crew have a video conference with studio exec Les Grossman]Les
Grossman: Which one of you f***faces is Damien Cockburn?
Damien Cockburn: Uh, that’s me, sir. It’s an honor to finally meet you. Get some face time.
Grossman: And who here is the key grip? [the key grip raises his hand] You? You! Hit that director in the face, really f***ing hard!
Key Grip: [reluctantly walks over to Damien] Sorry, man. [punches him in the face]
Grossman: This is all your fault, you Limey f***! You sh*t the money-bed, my friend.

I don’t get out of character until I do the DVD commentary.
Kirk Lazarus

What is with you people?!
Tugg Speedman

Im the dude, playing the dude, disguised as another dude
Kirk Lazarus

Goodbye mama, now you can have ice cream in heavan! I’ll see you again tonight when I go to bed in my head movies. But this head movie makes my eyes rain!
Tugg Speedman

[Lazarus and the gang are preparing their options for infiltrating the Flaming Dragon camp]
So, what’s the plan, man? You gonna talk Vietnamese to those dudes?Kirk
Lazarus: No, no. Mandarin Chinese. What I can tell, it’s what they’re speaking down there.
Portnoy: How the hell do you know Chinese?
Lazarus: Land of Silk and Money with Gong Li. Second Globe, third Oscar. I prepped for that one by working in a Beijing textile factory for eight months.

your just because i’m skinny
Jeff Portnoy

Wake up Hop Hop!
Tugg Speedman

Man were lost, were super lost!
Kirk Lazarus

The universe… is talking to us right now. You just gotta listen. [turns on Flo Rider’s “Low” and begins to dance to the beat]
Les Grossman

[Cody and Tayback are tied to a post in the Flaming Dragon compound]
Cody: Dude, dude, what the hell is going on here? Where are we?
I have no idea, I’ve never been outside the States.
Cody: Wait what?! Are you f***ing kidding me?! Did you make this whole g*dd*mn thing up?! Dude you weren’t even in the f***ing service?!
Tayback: Yes! Of course! Coast Guard!
Cody: Coast Guard.
Tayback: Sanitation Department.
Cody: Oh my God! You’re a f***ing garbage man! Dammit! F.L. Tayback lies to me and the whole g*dd*mn U.S. of A.
Tayback: I wrote the book as a tribute! I’m a patriot.
Cody: Yeah, you’re the Milli Vanilli of patriots okay? You lied about fighting in the Vietnam War. It’s like – It’s like punching the American flag in the face goddammit! God, to think I believed you!
Tayback: Writers lie all the time!
Cody: [a guard bursts in] Can I be tied to another post please?

Hey, Alpa, if you let me go right now, I will totally suck your dick. Stroke the shaft, cradle the balls, swallow the gravy! C’mon baby, let’s get this over with!
Jeff Portnoy

(To Kirk) Hold my hand Brother…
Tugg Speedman

To Tugg after talking to Sandusky……”For some reason he smells like bologna”.
Kirk Lazarus

Speedman is a dying star. A white dwarf headed for a black hole. That’s physics. It’s inevitable.
Les Grossman

Yo Tuggernuts! It’s the Pecker!
Rick Peck

[about Speedman] They’re going to kill him!
Rick Peck

It was like pistol whipping a blind kid.
Rick Peck

I killed one, Rick… the thing I love most in the world.
Tugg Speedman

My farm? Here’s my motherf*cking farm! I’m a lead farmer, motherf*cker!
Kirk Lazarus

I was wrong! Blow the bridge! Blow the f*cking bridge!
Tugg Speedman

[dancing along] Right…
Studio Executive Rob Slolom

I will massacre you! I will f*ck YOU UP!
Les Grossman

See, this is the good part, Pecker. This is when the job gets fun! Ask… and you shall receive!
Les Grossman

I got the TiVo!
Rick Peck

Studio Executive Rob
Wow. Right Oscars, 400 million dollars at the box office, and you saved Tugg Speedman’s career.Les
Grossman: I couldn’t have done it without you.
Slolom: Really?
Grossman: No, dickhead. Of course I could. A nutless monkey could do your job. Now, go get drunk and take credit at all the parties.
Slolom: I wouldn’t do that.
Grossman: Ah… joking.
Slolom: Ah, there he is! Funny. You’re a funny guy.
Grossman: Yeah. But seriously, a nutless monkey could do your job.

I dont know. who are you?
Tugg Speedman

I need some dudes up here that speak American, God damn it. He’s making a f*cking sweater back here. I’m trying to put Tiger Balm on this jungles nuts.

Cover me, limp dick f*ck-ups!
Kirk Lazarus

You went full retard man, never go full retard.
Kirk Lazarus

Man, everybody’s gay once in a while.
Kirk Lazarus

A Speedman is racing towards the chopper, getting shot repeatedly….”SURVIVE!
Kirk Lazarus

How’s the adoption thing going?
Rick Peck

I don’t know what kind of gun this is. I only know the sound it makes when it kills a man.
Four Leaf Tayback

What do you mean, you people?
Kirk Lazarus

It’s just corn syrup you guys! Blood flavored…corn syrup.
Tugg Speedman

Yeah, but those dudes are trained soldiers.
Alpa Chino

To be a moron, to be moronical. To be the dumbest mother f*cker who ever lived.
Kirk Lazarus

I will annihilate you! I will f*ck you up!
Les Grossman

What do you need, Peck?
Les Grossman

Me? I know who I am. I’m a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude.
Kirk Lazarus

Grossman: The universe is talking to us right now. You just gotta listen.[Grossman plays “Low” by Flo Rida in his music player, and he and Slolom begin dancing. Pecker is confused.]
Grossman: See, this is the good part, Pecker. This is when the job gets fun.Rob
Slolom: Mmm, yeah.
Grossman: Ask, and you shall receive.
Slolom: All right!
Grossman: You play ball, we play ball. [Slolom nods. Grossman begins dancing like he’s slapping *ss.] I know you want the goodies. Mmm!
Slolom: Welcome to the goodie room.
Grossman: You payin’ attention? ‘Cuz I’m talkin’ G5, Pecker. That’s how you’re gonna roll. No more frequent flyer b*tch miles for my boi. Oh yeah. Playa. Playa. Big dick playa.
Slolom: Swingin’ past your knees.
Grossman: Big dick, baby.
Slolom: Yup.[Grossman stops the music.]
Grossman: Or, you can grow a conscience in the next five minutes and see where that takes you.[Pecker stands up and faces Grossman.]Rick “Pecker”
Peck: Let me get this straight. You want me to let my client of fifteen years, one of my best friends, die in the jungle alone for some money and a G5.
Grossman: Yes.
Pecker: A G5 airplane.
Grossman: Yes. And lots of money. Playa…. [Grossman starts the music again, and he and Slolom start dancing again.]
Slolom: Yeah! Smack it up, flip up, rub it down, hoo!!

You spank that *ss, Les!
Studio Executive Rob Slolom

Damien: Crisis meeting? What does that mean, exactly? I mean, you know, are we in a crisis?
Rob: He’s the head of the studio. He’s reaching out. We’re 10,000 miles away. He just wants a little face-time.
Damien: I know. It’s just you said he called it a crisis meeting. So, you know…
Rob: It’s Les Grossman. He throws these words around. “Crisis,” “explosion,” “not rolling,” “fired.” These are just words.

You muh-muh-make me hah-pay.
Rick Peck

I know who I am! I’m a dude playing the dude, disguised as another dude!!
Kirk Lazarus

Hell nah, I ain’t pee on nat girl. No no listen, here’s the story she was in the way when I was peeing she walked past.
Alpa Chino

speedman is a dying star a white dwarf heading for a black role thats physics its inveditible
Les Grossman

You went full retard…..NEVER go full retard.
Kirk Lazarus

Lazarus: What about you, Master Blaster? You got a certain someone you trying to get with back in the States?Kevin
Sandusky: What, Alpa Chino? He’s like ten girls deep, 24/7.
Lazarus: No, you missin’ me, man. I’m talking about something special. Big difference. How about it?Alpa
Chino: Yeah. Yeah, there is.
Lazarus: Well? What’s the skinny? Y’all been on a date or what?
Chino: No. I mean…I always wanted to, but, I guess I just never had the courage to ask. It’s…it’s complicated.
Lazarus: No! It’s simple as pie, man. You plant your feet on the ground, you look her square in the eyes, you say, “Hey. Baby, you and me’s going on a date.” That’s the end of the story. What’s her name?
Chino: …Lance.
Lazarus: “Listen here, Lance…” Lance? What the f*ck did I just hear? Lance?
Sandusky: Did you say, “Lance”?
Chino: No!
Sandusky: That sounded like “Lance”.
Chino: No, I said “Nance”.
Sandusky: It sounded like “Lance”.
Chino: Look, I’m Alpa Chino, okay? I love the p*ssy, all right? Lay your *ss back down and look at the stars.
Lazarus: When you wrote “I Love Tha p*ssy”, was you thinking of dangling your dice on Lance’s forehead?
Chino: Naw, hell no! What? Come on, look…
Lazarus: Man, everyone’s gay once in a while!
Chino: I’m not gay!
Lazarus: This is Hollywood!
Chino: How about we all get back to work?
Lazarus: Okay, cool.
Chino: This is ridiculous! We got a big day tomorrow. Let’s get focused.
Alpa, if you untie me, I will literally suck your dick right now.
Chino: I told you, for the last time, I love tha’ p*ssy!
Portnoy: I’ll cradle the balls…stroke the shaft…work the pipe…swallow the gravy. Get it over here, buddy. Let’s do this.

I’m sorry your dingo aint your baby!!
Alpa Chino

Im a land farmer, MOTHA f*ckA!
Kirk Lazarus

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